Love will remain a mystery that we will never fully explain. However, it is possible to understand some of its edges. Buddhists, for example, offer us some keys to love and enjoy this feeling.
The keys to love, according to Buddhists, aren't something of the other world, but a simple application of common sense. An approach that emphasizes the ability to love and not so much in the possibility of awakening love in others.
Reality teaches us that everything that is sown is also what is collected. Therefore, if we elevate our capacity to love, the consequence of this will be that we are loved too. That what is given to us is important and what we can give becomes relevant. Keep in mind these five keys to achieve it.
" Do not hurt others with what causes you pain ".
-Buddha-
1. Understanding, one of the keys to love
The word "understanding" in love goes beyond a simple intellectual fact. Of course, It covers rational aspects, but it extends much further. It means understanding with the head, but mainly with the heart. Develop enough sensitivity to perceive the physical and emotional needs of the other. Also to respect them and try to satisfy them.
Understanding is one of the keys to love because it implies being able to see the other on their own terms and not in ours. Perceive and intuit their vulnerabilities and their weaknesses. See him as someone who is not perfect and who should not be judged for it either.
2. Make the heart evolve
One of the keys to love is to first fulfill the commitments we have with ourselves. The first one is learning to be happy and to be well, without having a partner next to you.
We can't hold the other responsible for the task of making us happy, filling our gaps or filling our needs. Who is not able to find happiness for himself, he will not find it through another person. Perhaps that illusion is created, but sooner or later you will discover that nothing can fill the void of absence that non-being leaves behind.
3. Being noble
Nobility and kindness are an overwhelming force. Sometimes one thinks that it is good who has a weak heart or a fragile character. That's not true. Being good with others is a decision born of conviction and strength. However, it is also one of the most decisive keys to loving others.
The nobility is characterized by seeking the good of others, as well as looking for their own. Do not deliberately or unnecessarily harm. Be able to sympathize with the suffering of the other and be willing to provide support whenever possible. A good person attracts the kindness of others.
4. Not having transient loves
The expression "passenger loves" is contradictory in itself. Love is never fleeting. It always leaves traces. What does exist is sometimes the desire to have fleeting adventures and romances, that provide sexual pleasure or nourish narcissism, without implying commitments or suffering.
When someone wants to lead his life in this way, what he really wants is that life doesn't touch him. It's like wanting to swim, watching the water from the shore. You may achieve your goal of touching the water without getting wet, but eventually, it will only open more and more the vacuum that is carried inside. There is a point where this not only doesn't satisfy but leads to feeling a kind of boredom for oneself and for others.
5. Recognize the four elements of love
According to Buddhists, love has four essential components. These are kindness, compassion, humor, and patience. Incorporating these aspects into a relationship is one of the keys to love that never fail. Each of them is indispensable.
The kindness encourages respectful and considerate. Compassion builds mutual loyalty and a deep sense of commitment. Suffering is shared, an indestructible bond is created. On the other hand, humor means mainly looking for the variety and amplitude of shared experiences. Patience is the basis of tolerance and good communication.
As you can see, the keys to love are accessible to everyone. They require to have enough interest and willingness to cultivate them. They aren't born spontaneously but must be developed patiently.
Consequently, Its fruits are very sweet and, they deserve the effort.
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